I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...