no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
