Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
