wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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