i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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