Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
My pussy is not your playground.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
