I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
