You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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