He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
