That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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