so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
