I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
You pole danced in your parka.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
