weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize