two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Randomize
