He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
