New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize