I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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