An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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