Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
