he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
