Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
