i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Also, beer. Big fan.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
