It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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