He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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