I like to think it a success when the cops are called
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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