Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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