I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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