I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Dicks are not precious.
Randomize
