You can't special order awesome
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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