I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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