addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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