Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
