it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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