Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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