Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
