hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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