I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
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