she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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