I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
We have started to decorate penises.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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