i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
