I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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