why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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