he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
