just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
