I think i sorta joined a cult last night
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
