I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Randomize
