So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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