just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
