I think im going to throw up on grandma
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
