I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
