Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
