he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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